Friday, January 23, 2009

Dreams Suck

I only have to work until 2 today, which is great. Andrea's teachers must like to work VERY hard, because they sure do have a ton of workdays.UGH! I am expecting Andrea to be in calculus next year, considering how hard these teachers work.
Anywho, I had to bring her to work with me.
I don't mind telling people online this, because #1 I can't see you, and #2, it really isn't anything to be ashamed of. I don't tell people I don't know very well ususally, not because I am ashamed, but I guess that it is not proper, but.........I'm on anti-depressants and just now some kinda hyper people pills, called Concerta. SO I take Concerta AND Cymbalta. top it off, they prescribed me Klonopin to sleep. GEEZ! I went to a Shrink after the bottom fell out of my life when my parents crap happened, almost 2 years ago, and this is what I walked out with. A therapist who I love, and drugs!!! I will tell you more about that later, but I have been very anti-drug even prescription (mind altering or habit forming) for years, and still to this day, blame Xanax for my Mothers backslide.
So, I am taking these meds, and they make me not sleep, so since I sleep lightly anyways, I take Klonopin to sleep,but it makes it hard to wake up.So, I haven't taken them lately, haven't slept with Nick in a while.
Last night I started dreaming VERY vividly about John Mayer. I think I love him!!! ha ha, but I do...really. It's no joking matter.I don't know if I love HIM, but I sure do love the guy in my dreams who looked and sounded like him. Ugh, same way with Nick these days. I LOVED the guy I thought he was, and that is why I havent left him. I hated that I kept waking up, but my dreams stayed the same when I fell back asleep, and when I woke up, I was happy, but now I am kinda disappointed. I don't want to have those type of feelings for any man again. MAKE BELIEVE feelings. I always do that, and its not fair to anyone, and that dream was a reminder of it. Does anyone know of a place to get a dream catchers that works???

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